From Insider: NBA Bizarro Awards: Camby for LVP

On Tuesday I chimed in with my picks for the traditional season-ending awards in the NBA. Today, I'd like to recognize their polar opposites. That's right, it's time for the annual Bizzaro Awards. We'll start with the biggie, the Least Valuable Player Award.

LVP: Marcus Camby, Knicks -- Sure he has talent, but is anybody better at wrecking a team's season? He plays just enough games to tantalize you, then misses just enough games to wreck your entire season.

Runner-up: Penny Hardaway, Suns -- We know Penny, it's all Stephon Marbury's fault. Just like it was Jason Kidd's fault before that. And Bob Hill's fault before that. And Shaquille O'Neal's fault before that. He's given a whole new meaning to the nickname "Little Penny" this year.

ROOKIE FLOP OF THE YEAR: Kwame Brown, Wizards -- Maybe we're being too hard on the kid. But as far as No. 1 picks go, he's been a disaster. While other high school kids like Tyson Chandler and Eddy Curry seem to be slowly getting it, Kwame is still lost. Yes, he has a wonderful set of skills, but seems to lack the requisite aggressiveness and desire to overcome his lack of experience.

Runner-up: Rodney White, Pistons -- Many pegged him early on as a Rookie of the Year favorite. Instead, he's gotten into a whopping 14 games all season and is averaging 3.5 ppg. His lack of defense has gotten him into Rick Carlisle's doghouse. Given the Pistons' sudden leap in the standings, will he ever get out of it?

LEAST IMPROVED: Larry Hughes, Warriors -- Went from shooting guard of the future to point guard of the future to DNP-Coaches Decision in the course of about 18 months. No one questions his athletic ability or his talent, but his decision-making skills are so poor, he makes the Grizzlies' Jason Williams look like an All-Star.

Runner-up: Courtney Alexander, Wizards -- Went from MJ's hand picked Air Apparent to MJ's whipping boy in a matter of months. He seemed to deflate before our very eyes the minute Michael stepped on the floor.

12TH MAN: Shawn Bradley, Mavs -- Signed a big contract before the season, yet is averaging only 14 mpg this year for the Mavs. Don Nelson has begged and pleaded with Bradley to get his act together, but he seems content having the best seat in the house.

Runner-up: Austin Croshere, Pacers -- A major disappointment, Croshere seems to get time only in garbage minutes despite the fact that some of the Pacers' key frontcourt players have been down with injuries. Is he that bad or does Isiah Thomas hate him that much? It's a combination of both, but blame Thomas for his 17.5 mpg this year.

WORST COACH OF THE YEAR: Isiah Thomas, Pacers -- Chalk this season up as another chapter in Thomas' book "The Fundamentals: Eight Plays for Winning the Games of Business and Life." Despite having talent at every position, the Pacers are free falling during crunch time in an already weak Eastern Conference. For some reason, Thomas has been unable to apply those "eight plays for winning" to his team. GM Donnie Walsh pulled off a major mid-season trade just to ensure that the Pacers made the playoffs but Thomas has been unable to integrate Ron Artest and Brad Miller into the team. Add on the fact that he's managed to alienate just about everyone on the team, and we have a winner.

Runner-up: Pat Riley, Heat -- His most grievous sins were committed while he was wearing his executive hat, but as a coach, he should've known that bringing in a bunch of hired guns for a season to play Pat Riley-style of basketball wouldn't be pretty.

ENRON EXECUTIVE OF THE YEAR: Garry St. Jean, Warriors -- He overpaid for Antawn Jamison, absolutely bungled the whole Marc Jackson situation, is in the process of destroying Larry Hughes's trade value, and has put together a hodgepodge collection of talented players who just don't fit well together. If the NBA had a three strikes and you're out rule, he'd be locked away for life.

Runner-up: Scott Layden, Knicks -- You can blame some of the mess Layden is in on Dave Checketts, but why he overpaid for Allan Houston, Shandon Anderson and Clarence Weatherspoon and traded for Howard Eisley is mind boggling. He made a bad cap situation much, much worse. If he ever digs himself out of this mess, he'll be the Executive of the Decade.

All NBA Buyer's Remorse Team
"The Juwan Howard Award"

C -- Shawn Bradley -- gives awkward seven footers a bad name
F -- Antonio Davis -- too much money, too many years for a guy who is already applying for his AARP card
F -- Antawn Jamison -- Warriors could've had him for half the money and they'd still be overpaying
G -- Allan Houston -- replaces Juwan Howard as the most overpaid player in the NBA
G -- Derek Anderson -- spent half of the season injured, the other half pouting. Who could've seen that coming?

All-NBA Buyer's Remorse Second Team

C -- Calvin Booth -- learned a lot playing half a season with Bradley
F -- Clarence Weatherspoon -- again, what was Scott Layden thinking?
F -- Shandon Anderson -- ditto
G-- Michael Dickerson -- do the Grizzlies even want him now?
G -- Jason Williams -- settled down just enough to ink that extension then went back to chucking shots from half court

All-NBA Jack Squat Team
AKA "The Golden State Warriors"

C -- Shawn Bradley -- eligible next year for the Lifetime Bizarro Nonachievement Award
C -- Kelvin Cato -- hording jack squat in case of a famine
F -- Austin Croshere -- still living off that one good playoff game
F -- Juwan Howard -- on year and counting . . .
G -- Shandon Anderson -- earns his money in the pre-game shoot arounds

All-NBA HMO Team
"The Zydrunas Ilgauskas Award"

C -- Marcus Camby -- a lemon if there ever was one
F -- Vin Baker -- always comes up a few donuts short
F -- Grant Hill -- will he ever be the same?
G -- Tariq Abdul-Wahad -- does anyone even care anymore?
G -- Terrell Brandon -- hasn't played a full season since 1993

All-NBA Retire Already Team
Renamed this year to the "Patrick Ewing Award"

C -- Patrick Ewing -- Doc Rivers is ready to call Jack Kevorkian
C -- Hakeem Olajuwon -- still thinks he's 25
F -- Charles Oakley -- if only his body worked as well as his mouth
G -- Mitch Richmond -- hopefully a title will satisfy him
G -- Mark Jackson -- maybe you can coach the Knicks

All-Rookie Stinka Team
"The Yinka Dare Award"

C -- DeSagana Diop -- didn't see that one coming, did you?
F -- Kwame Brown -- not sure the kid has a clue
F -- Rodney White -- all hype, no D
G -- Jeryl Sasser -- drafted ahead of Jamaal Tinsley and Tony Parker
G -- Joe Forte -- may spend all three years on the IL

Wow we have a player in every team except for that rookie team!!!!!! Well done Layden...